"WHY DON'T YOU TRUST ME?? ALL THAT WAS IN MY PAST!!!"

"Um, no, all that stuff was YESTERDAY."

Kids are great, right?

So Buffy and her friend are in the kitchen fooling around and trying to remember Mother Goose rhymes.

"Mom, Mom," she says, "How does it go?

Little Miss Muffet,
Sat on her... tuffet,
Eating her...
...
Crumpets and fish?"

I really need to start drinking more.
Alcohol.
Much more.
And not stop until La Buff hits 18.

*****

In other news, I went to school today thinking I was going to get a big fat F on my two exams today. Instead, I think I got roughly half right in Mythology (yeah, still an F but not a zero!) and possibly an A in Spanish. So a crappy day turned into a great day turned immediately into a really crappy day after Buffy got in trouble again. Blah. Boo to teenagers.

Wow, we had only three sets of trick or treaters tonight.
By the time the second set arrived I let them pick 3 DumDums each.
The third set got handfulls of them.

I now have a massive bowl of DumDums, the cheapest candy at Longs. I don't even like DumDums.

:-(

The kids went out tonight.
Buffy was a cop. Oh sweet sweet irony.
Spike chose a more literal costume: An ape.
A six foot tall ape.
His friend was a banana, and they spent most of their time chasing each other down the street making everyone laugh.

It really was hilarious.
I am used to the mechanical voice saying, "Your. Daughter. Was not. At school. Today." "Your. Daughter. Was tardy. At school. Today." Your. Daughter. Was sent. To the Principal's office. Today."

We have never ever heard that she "participated. Well." Hahaha. I was so glaring at Buffy over the phone when the mechanical voice started talking. I wish I could have seen my face when I heard what it told me!

One of the BEST benefits of having a son with a drivers license is that he can go grocery shopping for you. This is the best thing EVER. I just hand him the ATM card and keys and off he goes. WOOOO.

In other news: I'm bored.

Spike turns...

17 years old today!

Annie is right, it's for Playstation 2!

Believe it or not, my son and all his friends decided our house was the house to play video games at, so they all brought over ALL THEIR GAME SYSTEMS to my house, and they are all here stacked on top of one another. We have everything. I have no idea what is actually owned by US, haha. So I thought the guitar was plugged into the Nintendo, but it is actually plugged into the Playstation 2.

However, you should LISTEN to me! The game is Dangerous! With a Capital D! It will rule your house and your lives!!!!

Edited to add: OMIGOD, Annie is my best friend from third grade!!!! She found my journal many years ago, but I had no idea she was still reading! *waves* HI ANNIE!!!!!

Guitar Hero II = Evil

Spike, with his paycheck, bought Guitar Hero II for Nintendo. If you have never heard of this game, as I had not, it comes with a plastic electric guitar and you play the music for rock songs, from Primus to Motley Crue to the Stray Cats, even Free Bird.

And it is totally addicting.

I've never heard of some of these songs, like EVER, and would never ever ever listen to them on my own... but I'm a solid rock star when I get that little red guitar in my hands. No one in this house has done ANYTHING since we got this game. Well, we argue a lot over whose turn it is. And we love when Spike needs to go to work, cuz then we get to play more.

I am advising you all: Do not get this game. You will get nothing else done in your life!
(Buffy currently has control of the guitar, that's the only reason I'm on the computer!)

Spike went grocery shopping with me today. We were out of everything, but it was too hot to go anywhere before. I didn't even want to go today, but it was hard to deny there was only tortillas and cheese in the fridge. So off we went. Left Buffy at her friend's house. We had a good time. I love spending time with my boy.

The kids, well, Buffy mostly, have not shown a lot of excitement about the cruise, mostly because it has been a very very very far away thing to think about, also I think because it is unlike anything we've ever done, so the things I have planned and booked for us seem to them like things that are only done on TV. So yesterday Buffy comes home and says:

Buffy: So, are we really swimming with dolphins?

Me: Yep.

Buffy: And going snorkeling?

Yep.

And doing the gliding thing?

The Zip Lines? Yep.

And riding horses?

Yep.

What else? Are we going to Cabo?

Yep.

REALLY? We're really going to Cabo?

Yep.

For sure?

*****
It was the first glimmer of interest she has ever shown in the trip. But this wasn't just a glimmer, she sounded like it just hit her that she was actually going to do those things. She said her friend just took off on a cruise to Cabo this week, and her ship has a gym. Does our ship?

Yep.

She had a smile on her face. FINALLY! 32 days Folks. And she even knows the countdown herself. Yayyyyyy.

Spike was inching his way out the door to go to lunch with this "girl" he's been sort of seeing on and off again, "nothing serious" from what I have been hearing.

"She's driving you? Has she had her license for a year yet?

"Oh yeah. She's had a license for a LONG time."

"What does that mean?"

"She's twenty."

And he closed the door behind him.

Reason #333228 why I hate the high school.

So I'm just getting everything together to leave for work today and my cell phone rings. It's one of Buffy's friends from school to let me know that Buff is in trouble, but that she really didn't DO anything this time, and that Buffy is really upset and distraught, and honestly, she didn't even DO anything, she SWEARS, and they're just calling to tell me that this time, Buffy really didn't do anything.

Jeeez.

Immediately my cell phone starts beeping again - it's ANOTHER friend, telling me the exact same story.

So I got in my car and drove to the school thinking I would be getting a call from school any time now. Of course I didn't, because actually calling parents is something they can never do and that is reason number 837288 why I hate that school.

I get to the office and Buffy is standing there in tears with the "Friend who is a very very very bad influence" (FWVVVBI). FWVVVBI says "Buffy didn't do it, she wasn't even there, I did it. It was all me."

Did you TELL someone that she wasn't there? "Yes." You told them it was YOU and not Buffy? "Yes." So why is Buffy still sitting here in the office? They didn't know.

And so where is the counselor? (Not to mention my phone call). She is no where. Buffy breaks down sobbing again because "This is the last day of school and they're RUINING it, I didn't even DO anything, and they said I'll need to have a PROBATION OFFICER and I wasn't even THERE and I just want to go outside for lunch and talk to my FRIENDS!!! *SOOOB*"

So some adult walks over and asks what the problem is. I told her the two girls were in trouble, they were told they had to sit there, and I was here to find out what was going on. Where is the counselor?

She didn't know. "What would you like me to do?" she asks me. How about you find the counselor?? "Well, I don't know where she is." Okaaaay. I blinked at her. "So what would you like me to do?" Are you fucking kidding me? I would like you to find the counselor so I can find out what is going on so I can go to fucking work, THAT is what I would like you to do. "Well I don't know where she is right now. What should I do?" ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME????

After 15 minutes the counselor comes in and asks me and Buffy into her office. She tells us that Buffy is suspended. Because FWVVVBI was caught trying to set off a stink bomb in class and the teacher was pretty sure she saw Buffy with her. The counselor acknowledged that Buffy says she wasn't there, that three other students said she wasn't there, and that FWVVVBI said she was there on her own. But the other teacher, who does not know Buffy, thought she saw her. And for this Buffy is now suspended on the last day of school. And being threatened with a probation officer - and you should know right now there would have been HELL to pay if she was given a PO over something stupid like this with so many witnesses stating she wasn't even there.

Buffy let her frustration bubble over at that point and started, um, telling the counselor off, basically. Which, well, everything Buffy said was true, but I don't approve of kids speaking to adults in that manner even though this counselor - on my 500th time dealing with her - is still obviously an idiot. I told Buffy to settle down. "YOU CAN ASK ANY KID IN MY CLASS IF I WAS SITTING RIGHT THERE THROUGH THE WHOLE PERIOD. *SOBBB*"

So the counselor took some names from her and said she would call them to verify. If they verified, she would be un-suspended. But because they pulled her out of class where she was taking finals, and now the classes where half over, she would have to take her finals in the office.

And so I went to work, and just got a call saying that Buffy's story checked out, they found witnesses who confirmed she was in class, and so she is un-suspended. (even though she already had plenty of witnesses who ALREADY said she wasn't at the scene) But she still has to take her final in the office. And because she missed so much time sitting in the office, she will be late getting out of school on her last day.

I don't know why Buffy even wants to stay at that stupid school. I don't know how I'm going to deal with another three years of them. When Buffy actually does something bad it is ME who has to call the school three times just to make sure they are going to issue a punishment - which never materializes. Today she does nothing, has several witnesses who said she was sitting right in class, and still she had to find more witnesses to get out of a suspension - that never should have happened in the first place.

A probation officer???

I just accidentally came across this picture and HAVE to share it with you because this kid was just way too cute for herself.

http://pischina.diaryland.com/images/beautiful.jpg

In answer to a question about the below article, yes, there is a law about kids driving other kids around. In California when you get your driver's license you are prohibited from driving other kids in your car without another adult in the car for one year. In this case, the driver was 17, so he probably cleared that rule already.

I mean... they had to be driving at an incredibly fast rate to do what they did on that particular road. I see cars doing incredibly STUPID things on that road every day on my way home, and they aren't all teenagers. In fact, most of them are NOT teenagers. The accident could have happened to anyone, and it should not have happened to anyone.

But when it's your child, I don't think it even matters. If anything, it makes it worse. If Spike leaves my house and does something incredibly stupid like that and gets himself killed... He's still dead.
:-(
I feel so badly for their families.

So two kids at the high school were in a car crash by our house over the weekend, crashed their car head on into oncoming traffic, hit trees, and burst into flames. The story going around is they burned to death. The newspaper article just says they were DOA. Buffy just knew who they were, but they were very good friends and next door neighbors of her friend, who is of course traumatized. I'm not sure if Spike knew them - but they were his age.

It's so so so so so so so so scary. Buffy and I have been fighting all day because I won't let her sixteen year old friend drive her to school, even though it's against the law for her friend to drive other kids for one year. She doesn't get it. But as a parent, I do. I get that those parents will never see their sons ever again, and will have the image of them possibly being burned alive forever with them. I couldn't live with that. I'm telling you right now, if something happens to either of my kids, I won't make it.

When I drive with Spike, it's not (usually) his driving that scares me - it's the other drivers that go past us doing 80 on the 40mph road. Spike doesn't have the reflexes yet to get out of the way or even notice those drivers headed toward him yet. That is what scares me to death. I don't know how parents actually give up and say "Here, here's your license. Be careful." I'm going to worry myself sick every minute he's gone.

It's just horribly depressing. I can't stand thinking about what those parents are going through. I don't know how they are getting through it. Or how anyone gets through it. I'm telling you all right now, I couldn't do it.

I can barely deal with my stupid sick cat.

Spike came home from working today and said "This is the best job EVER. I LOVE this job!!!"

Turns out he gets to "eat for free and talk to hot girls all day long! ...and get PAID for it!"

Must be nice to be a teenage boy.

Spike started his very first job ever Friday. He works at Melt Gelato and Crepe Cafe in Eastridge Mall. So of course Buffy and I had to go buy some gelato - and take a picture! The managers put him in charge of the front counter, which seemed like a great idea because he was rounding up ever teenage and preteenage girl in the vicinity into the store. I sat there for fifteen minutes watching girl after girl make googoo eyes at him as they sampled the gelato.
He loved it, said it was a lot of fun - but was a little bummed when he realized he only made about $25 the entire night. Welcome to minimum wage work, Boy, that's why you stay in school!

It was a great place to eat though.

So because we are an adventurous family and I am a lunatic, the kids and I got together and considered all the options for excursions on our cruise. I am going to have the scares and adventures of my life, but this is going to be a vacation we will never forget our entire lives. It's going to be our own little Amazing Race:

Puerto Vallarta:
9am - 2pm Canopy Adventure (ZIP LINES! 14 of them! 90 feet in the air!!!)
4pm - 8:30pm Sunset Horseback ride through rainforest with BBQ dinner

Mazatlan:
Shopping, buffet lunch and the beach - AHHH, Rest and safety!!!!

Cabo San Lucas:
Morning: Possible Swimming with dolphins or Kayaking
Afternoon: Snuba Diving

I am so scared of the zip lines I can't even think about them, but there's no way I'm not going to do them.
I know I never explained this, but I'm taking only the kids because Scott would not have fun on the Full Throttle Vacations that I take with the kids. Even when we're not doing Amazing Feats of Daring we still are Go-Go-Go non-stop on vacation. When I'm on vacation with Scott, we like to rest.

Which is why I'm going back to a different part of Mexico with Scott next January on another cruise, no kids allowed.
:-D

Spike had his first driving lesson this morning and the instructor said he was "the best first time driver she ever had", so this afternoon I let him drive my car...

He was a very happy boy as you can see from the picture... but it wasn't the best ride *I* ever had... there were some close calls and once during a turn me yelling "SlowDownSlowDownSLOWDOWNSLOWDOWNSLOWDOWNSLOWDOWN!!!!

I think I'll let him take another lesson before he drives MY car again.

So the new glass company came by this afternoon, replaced both panes of glass, and only charged me $175, much less than the first company was going to.

I have to say, he was quite impressed with her broken window and how she has recently written all over her walls with a sharpie pen, and a few other recent stories I told him.

He left and told me "Thanks for the birth control. I'm going to go ride my bike and slip off the seat now." I'm not even kidding.

Ready for the next chapter in the Fixing-One-Stupid-Window story?

So I came home after school to wait for the window guys to come, and luckily at least the internet works now so I could work from home while waiting. So I waited and waited, and finally I noticed a voicemail message. I listened to it, and the glass company wanted me to call them.

And they told me that their boss just told them my house is "just out of area" and they can't come fix the window.

Even though they've already been out here once, ordered a new window, accepted my cancelation and rescheduled for today.... and then they don't tell me until today that they can't come???

I was too boggled to even yell. They gave me the number of two other companies closer to me. I called one company and told him the story. "They told you WHAT????" He couldn't believe it either.

So I made an appointment with him. For Friday afternoon. Luckily, I have no school then, so I am home anyway... but what if I wasn't?? What if I didn't have working internet so I could work from home, or what if I wasn't able to work from home anyway?? I've never heard something so ridiculous.

But the element of surprise worked in their favor, because I was too damned surprised to yell.

I forgot to update this part, but you know that week long madness below?

After the glass guys left, after asking Buffy over and over and over again "WHY did you throw away the window?????!!!!!!" and her telling me over and over and over again "I didn't think you needed it", and then it was 6pm and Spike comes home and hears us still mad at each other and he tells me...

"She didn't throw it away. It's on the side of the house."

***FUME***

So I had to call the glass people back... leave a message... to please cancel the window order... and please come back with the glass... and now it won't be $445 for a whole window, but it's not going to be $225 anymore because they have no intention of coming out AGAIN and being sent away, so now it's $275.

So Spike put the slider part in Buffy's room... and she goes in there later... and...

"Hey Mom! I found my window!"

I kid you not.

So Buffy met Catie today (I think they've met before), and it was just like the commercial for that cruise ship where they go searching for that lost thing... the smile on their daugher's face. Can I say that Buffy has been bordering on getting murdered (by me) since last week, and today she was barely allowed to come to the movies, and is barely speaking to me (nor I to her), but boy when she saw Catie she just SMIIIIIIILED like there was no tomorrow. Of course, Catie gave us cupcakes this weekend and Buffy ate more than her share so that made her happy too, but it would be nice to have a nice daughter every once in awhile!!!
Yeah, I know, I have a few more years to go before I see that smile directed at ME. Stupid teenagers.
>:-(

After I picked her up from her dad's house this evening, where she had to stay because she is grounded:

"GAWD, (stepmother) is such a big fat BITCH. She (blah blah blah this and that whateverrrrr)!"

"So, are you saying she's a bigger bitch than me?"

".... No."

Buffy Quote #2

While standing in line for the Opening Night movie:
"Mom, you're not really going to actually READ THAT SCHOOL BOOK in line, right???"
"Yes, I'll be reading in line for the next two weeks."
"NERD!!!"

Buffy came home and I asked her to look at my ring, and she didn't want to - you know, she's "too busy" to stop and pay attention to me now - but I insisted and she came over and looked and - "Ohmigod Mom, that's HECKA pretty!!!!"

:-D
She likes it!

New picture of Buffy with a friend from Water Polo. Buffy is on the right, for those of you not familiar with her.
Isn't she pretty?

Happy Birthday to Youuu
Happy Birthday to Youuuuu
Happy Birthday to Spi-i-ike....
Happy Birthdayyy
toooo
Youuuuuu!!!

LOVE YOU!

Spike's Friend: When I retire I'm gonna be FAT RICH, and buy THIS and THAT and sit on my butt and play HALO all day, and ---

Spike: First you have to get a JOB.

From the comments:
"Buffy impresses me. If I had half of her convicton at her age I wouldn't have wasted so much time trying to cultivate it myself. Obviously you did something right."

Well, you know, it's true, and that's why we're so proud of her and think she's going to do so well in her life - I certainly was not like that when I was her age, and it's important for girls to stand up for themselves and their beliefs.

On the other hand, this trait also causes her to be hard-headed and stubborn as a mule in every single other aspect of her life too. Which makes her teenage years EVEN MORE FUN as a parent. NOT. heh.
No, if it's possible to love someone and be so proud of someone and want to strangle someone all at the same time, Buffy's got it down. I just need to get her and me through the next few years all in one piece and she'll be ready to take the world by the horns.

Just beware, she WILL be Queen of the World. So get those curtseys ready, you can be sure she'll make them required.

So Buffy went to church camp on Sunday and invited her friend (a male) along. He's a sweet boy and was concerned that he wouldn't make friends, even though I assured him I thought he would fit right in with that crowd.

Today was their beach trip and Mark was able to get reception on his cell phone, so he let Buffy call me. She said Mark is having so much fun he doesn't even hang out with her. And she's having a ton of fun too. That makes me happy.

She comes back on Friday. I have the day off and we're all going to the beach. Sunday Spike and his friend go to camp for a week. Ahhhh... more peace and quiet in the house.

Buffy is now on her way to Arizona.
I'm sad. I miss her and I want her to be safe.

So my son, in his Sophomore year of high school, has already passed his exit exams for high school.

He's passed maybe four classes in 2 years, but he scored 50% more points than needed for his exit exams.

And he was totally shocked. TOTALLY. Where did this kid get the idea that he is stupid?? I don't get it.

Nothing like an overnight guest projectile vomiting all over your house and a quick 4am drive to take the kid home.

The child is an awesome vomiter though. Man. All over the door even.

She was a trooper though. Didn't even cry. Buffy was the one having a fit about the mess all over her room.

It was quite a clean up. Poor kid.

Another day, another rule broken by Buffy.
I'm going to kill that child.
You gotta hand it to her, she never repeats the same rule twice. She comes up with a new one every day.

Hey ya'll, remember when she was cute?

Teenage Drama. Jeez.

So Buffy got in trouble again last week and was grounded. She has been very sweet and loving ever since. Now another "BFF" is having a birthday party this week and her father and I said that was covered under the grounding and she couldn't go. So she hates me again. She hates me more than her father because I "went along with what he said." She's mostly mad because Spike was grounded TWO YEARS AGO but still got to go out for a concert (that he received tickets for as a graduation present). For some reason, because of that one night that he got off, she should be able to get off grounding every single time she wants to go some where.

So here I am, the worst mother in the world, AGAIN.

Don't worry, I'm not losing sleep over it.

You would think after ALL the times the kids, especially Spike, have gotten poison oak that they would learn:

a) What it looks like
b) Don't touch it!!

But no. Spike has it on his face. Again.

Well, Charleen kind of said "You're taking the rest of the week off now just shut up about it already," so now I have a few days to get things done.

Took Buffy to the doctor and got her some Zyrtec and Prednisone for her face, and Vicadin for her tooth. She sat in the waiting room while all the other sick kids stared at her, and I laughed. Heee. Troll. She was a good sport about it though.

Waited an hour at the pharmacy, but finally got our stuff and was out of there. She took her stuff and her tooth feels better and the swelling is going down, but she still has crud all over her face.

Came home and made reservations for the hotel. We're going on a real vacation!!!

Now I do some work, call the Home Consignment place, and get some more stuff out of my mom's house.

Tomorrow register Buffy for high school, take more stuff out of house, and hopefully meet some movers.

Wednesday do even more stuff.

Still way behind, but getting there.

***But Charleen's father is now being rushed by ambulance to the hospital for chest pains, so hopefully that's going to be okay. It seems her father never got the memo that no one's parents are allowed to be ill. For another 15 years or so. So think good thoughts for him.

Everyone stay out of my way today, seriously

Fucking dentist has absolutely no time to see Buffy until Friday, and won't prescribe pain medication because she hasn't been seen at that office before. This is an ongoing problem for 2-3 months now, and because no dentist in San Jose knows how to fix her tooth she has to just live her life with this pain??? So I have a 10:45 appointment with the doctor to see her poison oak and then I'm going to plead with them to give her something.

At this point if I don't get a vacation with or without the kids I am going to seriously snap.

Another lovely Monday

So Buffy has another toothache, the same tooth that's been hurting the last two months. Her father had her Xrays and the paperwork to call the new dentist but over an entire month of me calling him he never had one minute to call the dentist so now she has another toothache again. I'm not very happy with Buffy either as I told her every single day to get the Xrays and paperwork back from her deadbeat father so I could call them myself, but she slacked on that too, and now we have to go through this again. I'm sorry, but I'm calling bullshit on this. First, I'm furious with her father for doing NOTHING at all about this, leaving me to take time off work three times in 2 months to get her to appointments, but I'm also pissed off at Buffy because I nagged and nagged her every single day to get this taken care of before the toothache came back. And now I'm supposed to feel sorry for her? So now here I am working from home again waiting for the dentist to call me back to see if I can get her an emergency appointment.

But on top of that, she decided it would be a great idea to play in the creek this weekend, and now she has poison oak all over her face which is puffed up like a balloon.

She's a mess, and I feel bad for her, but I'm also furious that she brought BOTH of these things on herself, and now I have to take time out of my schedule - which has NO MORE TIME LEFT - to get this all taken care of. Again.

So at least two of you have heard of Parkour, and it seems you have the same reaction I did.

It is so totally cool. And even cooler to see your 15 year old son doing these incredible athletic feats.

It is also so totally obviously dangerous. Especially when it's your 15 year old son doing it.

And I did feel conflicted about this. I want to say "WOW Spike, that's INCREDIBLE! I can't believe you scaled that 3-story building! I can't believe how you swung from the roof-tops like that!"

And then I also want to say "Are you out of your MIND??? I FORBID you to do this!!!!"

I did tell him I wanted to set two rules: No jumping off second story buildings (I saw him on tape jumping from a one-story roof), and no jumping roof to roof, which is featured in many of the internet videos.

And from here, as a parent, all I can do is cross my fingers and hope he stays safe.

I need to double my insurance coverage now

So Spike is now involved in something called Le Parkour.

Has anyone out there heard of this insane "sport"?

I originally understood from Spike that it involved running, and jumping over fences, and he even mentioned climbing buildings.

But my fifteen year old son isn't climbing buildings, right?

He just showed me a video of himself last night. It involved him climbing up the wall of a three story building, via the drain pipe. I saw video of him hanging off the edge of roofs and basically climbing walls spider-man style. The boy's arms must be strong, I'll tell you that. And he's good, I gotta give him that too.

I mean, I don't know many people who can climb up a three story wall in less than 10 seconds...

But... BUT... !!!!!

According to the internet, this is the new big thing. Please someone tell me if you've even HEARD of this???

"Buffy, you want to see two movies tonight?"

"No."

"Well, pleeeeease? It looks really good!"

"MOM! I'm a growing girl and I need my SLEEP!"

"We'll be home by 11... (tiny lie)"

"NO MOM."

"Please? I'll let you sleep with your head on my shoulder."

"NO!"

"I'll buy you an ice cream."

"Okay."

Okay at the moment Buffy is okay.
Long story short, the Endontist knows what he has to do, but he cannot get to the tooth because it hasn't come in yet. So we get to make the trip back to see him every 30 days until it comes in. Which, with Buffy's record for sprouting teeth may not be until 2008.
So instead, for now she has a prescription for amoxycillin that we hope will kill the bacteria that have taken up residence in the tooth and then the pain will go away for awhile.

It was a long afternoon yesterday.

Buffy stayed home from school today with a bad toothache.
Her dad took her to the dentist and they said she has a cavity in a molar that has not even come in yet (don't ask me how) and the root isn't formed yet so they cannot do a root canal.
So I have to take her to a "root specialist" at 3:15.
Which will probably require a fat check to be written, even though we have insurance
(thanks to ME, and not their stupid father).

One thing for sure, I did not send her to that dentist that is STILL taking money out of my account, although they are still SWEARING that the refund "is on the way."

So last night I spoke with Spike about... not being a loser, heh... and we hit upon a career that actually interested him and wasn't like, Magician, or Door Man, or Comedian.

He thinks he may want to teach physical education in college. And I think he would be really great at that, and I think he could do it.

So this morning I was driving along the freeway to work and daydreaming like crazy about my son who was going to finish high school and go to college and get his Masters and go on to teach college...

And I passed up my exit. Heh.

The daydream was worth it.

Scott is unable to come over tonight so my schedule has changed.

1. Go home and beat the kids
2. Look at the mail.
3. Beat the kids maybe some more.
4. Eat some soup.
5. See if any more beatings need to be distributed.
6. Watch The Brothers Grimm
7. Hand out the Before Bed Beatings.
8. Go to bed and dream of being childless.

See? Sounds like a LOVELY evening!

Getting things done

Yesterday I:

Had my final transcript sent to the University < insert Big Smiley here >
Bought my English Lit book, which ended up being a newer version and so the page numbers don't match the syllabus < insert Smiley that tears its hair out here >
Found out my son may be gearing towards a career in counterfeit currency < insert ROFLMAO Smiley here >
Found out my daughter is following in her big brother's footsteps regarding her grades < insert Smiley with smoke coming out its ears >
Sat and tried to relax while watching A Bronx Tale on DVD. Ahhhhhh... Finally a good movie...

Today I:

Called the high school and left message asking why I still have not been notified that my son may be in the counterfeiting business < insert Smiley with ?? >
Called the dentist to ask why I STILL HAVEN'T GOTTEN A REFUND BUT THEY DID TAKE OUT ANOTHER $100 FROM MY BANK ACCOUNT (Answer: I'll get my refund in 4 more weeks) < Insert Smiley loading its gun >

Tonight I'm going to:

Take Scott out to dinner at Aqui's
Make the kids sit at a different table
Watch Madagascar with Scott
Go to bed and dream about a childless life.

*****

Itsy: A really really good time for a 5K would be around 15 to 17 minutes.
I *think* my best official time is a 24, when I ran my ass off for a bet but wasn't really trained yet
My worst time was a 35 when I was stuck in the porty potty as the gun went off and I had to sprint up a hill and down the block to catch up to the crowd.
None of my official times are any good because I never managed to race when I was in great shape for the 5K.
But I would be really happy if I did a 20 this time. I think I can do it, No reason why I can't one day soon.

Kids are exhausting.
I don't know how many more years of this I can take.

More Buffy-isms...

Last night she made reference to the "Constitution of Independence"

And this year she is studying American History. I need to find out what's going on in that class.

;-)

Buffy saw a reference to Ronald Reagan on a DVD yesterday.

"Who is Ronald Reagan?" she asked me as I cringed.

I have no idea where this child came from.

Spike tried to make a cherry pie last night, "Just like Grandma".
It wasn't just like grandma's, and it was watery and I'm not sure why, but it was definitely good.
It was his first try. I know my mother's first try, when she tried to make one for my father 40 years ago, she turned the oven on Broil instead of Bake and it was a disaster that made her cry but my dad insisted on eating it anyway.
Spike will get the pie right, I betcha, eventually, just like my mom did.

I have mentioned before my love of The L Word, and even though I could watch that show over and over again, I never ever watch it in front of the kids. Although god knows Spike would probably love it.

So after finishing the Season Two DVDs in about three days, I realized there was a lot of good music there and maybe there was a soundtrack, and sure enough there is, one for each season. So I ordered them from Amazon.

So the other day at work I get a call from Buffy, and she says I have a package, and I've forgotten already about my order and I was trying to remember what it was and then she says:

"< insert dripping disgust > It's your... LES-bi-an CDs."

Me: *caught off guard* "My what?"

Buffy: *drip drip drip goes the disgust* "Your LES-BI-AN CDs. From that LESBIAN show."

And I couldn't help it, I just started cracking up, the way she said it was SO HILARIOUS, like she ALWAYS KNEW I was hiding being a lesbian, and NOW SHE HAS PROOF, and OMIGOD THE EMBARRASSMENT.

So I went home and loudly exclaimed, "SO WHERE'S MY LESBIAN CD'S???" and now whenever we get into the car and she wants to change the station I tell her, "Oh no, wait, let's listen to MY LESBIAN CDS."

And I just realized I never did ask her how she knows about the show, if she got into my Netflix DVDs when I wasn't home or what, but you know what? The CDs are great. Especially, well, I guess they are BOTH great. So you should buy them. Unless, you know, you don't want to have any LESBIAN CDs at your house.

Because, you know, Dusty Springfield and Rufus Wainwright... TOTAL lesbians.

I.
Hate.
13 year old Girls.
And...
The 15 year old BOYS who touch them.

Someone is going to die, and I know that because Buffy's father is going to get his hands on him first.

And if you are a 13 year old girl, you know what? Don't make out with fifteen year old boys who are so stupid as to have a picture taken of you making out with each other ON YOUR BED and who then post it on their stupid MySpace which is linked to YOUR MySpace which is linked to your MOTHER'S MySpace.

Because see? Now your 13 year old ass is going to a babysitter every single day after school, and that's only if you're lucky enough to survive what your father is going to do to you now that your mother has emailed him the photo.

Also, Miss 13 year old BUFFY... it was your godmother CHARLEEN who found the stupid picture and you are oh so grounded for the rest of your life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Buffy: ur just jelouse cause u dont have mad abreviating skills like me

Oh yeah, and I'm totally hating on your spelling skillz too Buffy.

Oh I completely forgot to mention it with the heat and all, but
WE WON FINALS!!!!!
And the best part?
Was beating that stupid team.

And Spike did great too, and there's pictures over at Flickr and a journal entry up too.

I forgot to put this in today's journal entry, but Buffy is still going through her little heart break, only now she's just turned to a Woman Scorned, which let me tell you... Scary.

So Timmyboy broke up with her yesterday (just as I was starting to LIKE him, too!) and she was sad, and then he IMed her and told her he didn't know what he was thinking, and that he wanted to get back together. So she was happy again. But then his friend pasted an IM conversation with him and gave it to Buffy, where Timmyboy says he only got back together because he felt bad for her...

Hooo Boy. 9.2 earthquake in the house at that moment.

This absolutely infuriated Buffy. If you can scream over Instant Messenger, that's what she was doing. And then she told him she HATED him, and then she blocked him.

"I'm erasing his MySpace," she said calmly. "I made it for him, and I'm taking it away."

I told her not to, that he wasn't trying to hurt her, but she didn't care. She just looked up at me with this very calm, evil, determined look - that I know has flashed from my very eyes at times - and said she didn't care and was going to erase it anyway. I pleaded with her, it didn't matter. Finally, I just forbid her to do it.

***I just peeked at it right now to make sure she obeyed me -- it's still there but his comments are gone and boy is it all messed up.

I hope he's looking over his shoulder today.

Buffy just called and said her little boyfriend just broke up with her because he didn't want a girlfriend any more. I didn't think she would mind too much, but she says she is sad. My heart hurts for her.
:-(

So Saturday morning I'm sitting in the coffee shop with Scott and my cell phone rings. And it's The Ex telling me that Spike has "flea bites" "all over his body" even his face, and so I need to set off a flea bomb in my house.

Okay, so the fleas do love Spike, and the fleas love me, and they tend to leave Buffy alone, probably all that sour blood she has, heh, but I thought it awful odd that Spike would be COVERED wtih bites when I didn't have any, plus the fact that he didn't have any bites when he left the house in the morning.

So I argued with The Ex a little bit but not much because, well, I was at the Aptos coffee shop and he could kiss my ass and take care of his son for once.

So I pick up Buffy for her confirmation class this morning and she's telling me how Spike is always so nice when he's sick, and I asked if he was sick right now. She said no, he wasn't sick, but he had "flea bites" all over him and was miserable and itchy, and in her opinion Spike needed to get to the doctor because "he gets more bites every day."

Okay, the bites are appearing and spreading while he's at HIS DAD'S house, but the fleas are supposedly at MY house.

So this evening I speak to Buffy on the phone and it turns out that Spike does not have flea bites, he has POISON OAK. From crawling all around in the creek with his dorky 14 year old friends.

Now he's covered with calamine lotion.

Hee.

Dear Buffy and Spike:

Hey, when the appliance repairman was here to fix the oven it would have been really really great if, like you had been instructed on the phone five minutes before, you had mentioned the goshdarn WASHING MACHINE that he could have fixed in a total of five entire minutes, but you know, I understand you didn't have time to mention four little words, "ALSO THE WASHING MACHINE", I mean they are multi syllabic words, and besides that, I really don't mind spending ten bucks and 90 minutes at the laundromat today, it's not like I have two 1500 word essays, a history exam and a science exam all due this week, so anyway, no big deal, "also the washing machine" was just too much trouble, I understand.

Love,
Mom

I went to pull up my diary to read something real quick while Spike was sitting behind me playing video games. The trick is, bring the site up, then scroll down ASAP so no one reads the title and starts thinking about things...

So I nonchalantly bring it up, scroll down real-fast, and -

"PISCHINA DIARY OF A GROWN WOMAN" exclaims Spike as he finishes shooting the bad guy on TV.

That boy's too smart and too quick, how can he be failing Algebra AND Journalism????

Spike's new girlfriend (of-the-week) is named Jezebel.

No kidding.

Update! Again! ...And Spike too!

First of all, I updated, AGAIN!!! Yeah, I KNOW!

Second of all, I was sitting here hitting "random entry" and reading my some of my old entries, and I get to April 13, 2003, and I read "Spike got his report card today and he got straight A's!"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAA!!!!!

Like I'm ever going to get a chance to write THAT again. Then again, you never know with kids. That's the only thing you can count on is that they will always surprise you.

So today's field trip was to Trinity Episcopal Cathedral and this one I loved. I wish I could find a website that had photos of the interior of the church because this was the most beautiful place EVER. Built in 1865 out of Santa Cruz Redwood, there's just no words to describe it. Plus, the service was very enjoyable and the people there were very nice. This was a much better experience than the catholic church we went to last month.
Anyway.

Miss Buffy came back from her birthday snowboarding trip yesterday. She took lessons with her friend and apparently Buffy was "the bomb". She had a fantastic time.

The best thing is, Miss Attitude seems to have been left in the snow. Nice. I wonder how long until she finds her way back home?

Ya know, it's really hard to be a parent and read in your son's blog about something that has made him so sad. I know he'll be okay in the long run, but it really hurts to hear how he is hurting. It sucks to be a teenager, but it sometimes hurts to be the parent of one.

I think it's funny that I volunteered to help drive the kids to the Catholic church and it never even occurred to me that I would probably have to actually attend the service myself. Heh.

Did not like it. No offense to Catholics, REALLY, I just really love my own church. This particular church was very noisy, crying babies and talking and playing children, even the adults were all talking to each other through the whole service. It gave me a gosh darn headache. No one was paying attention, not that they had to because everything seemed to be on autopilot - we visitors didn't know what we were doing, but everyone else knew when to chant back "and also with you" and "So says the Lord" or something like that. No one had to think about anything or pay any attention, it was just the same old thing they did every Sunday in church. In contrast to my church which is very quiet, just a nice hour of quiet meditation and some singing, and a nice, informative sermon that gives us something to really think about and sometimes even changes our lives.

Every religion has something for everyone, I'm not knocking the Catholic church or traditions, I just know now that I really really love my church and it is definitely the right one for me.

Hopefully Buffy doesn't bring lightening strikes to the church

6:04am on Sunday and I'm already up and showered and dressed and drinking coffee. Buffy's confirmation class is visiting a Catholic church today and I'm one of the drivers. NEXT week she has to feed the homeless - which means we have to be at church at 6:30 am!!!

Anyway... Off I go...

Okay, Alias? Well that was totally boring last night, at least *I* thought so. Buffy and I could hardly stay awake the last hour.

Speaking of Buffy... oh God she's a teenager now... worse than you could ever imagine... time to call the nunnery...

Oh yeah and even Spike is mad at me because I "lied" to them, haha, all depends on whose version you're looking at I guess, and what it all comes down to is Buffy was plotting to have some boy over here while I was at work and Spike was plotting to blackmail her to do all his chores for him and yet they were CAUGHT, by ME, and now I'm the bad guy because I read about it in her diary, even the page where she used words I've only ever seen before in my email spam box.

I can't tell you how bad and sorry I feel about reading the diary... NOT! NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT!!!! Little Booger Brats are lucky I didn't kill them both and they know it!!! I am SO not sorry. "What kind of mom are you?" Spike writes in his little blog. Well son, that would be the kind who CARES ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS TO HER KIDS, and obviously that action was needed because Folks, if you had read what I read...

And now she has to be babysat by her grandmother every day after school. And is allowed no access to the computer. And I am NOT sorry.

Okay, did anyone here actually think I was NOT going to get a call last night about girls in Spike's room?

I am off work early so I can take Spike to church where he'll be picked up for a weekend of community service in Sacramento, and a Christian Rock concert Saturday evening.

I hope he doesn't corrupt the poor kids, heh.

And I hope they keep the church girls faaaaaaaaaar away from him.

Anyway, after that, I am off to Aptos! Hurray! And more essays! Boooo!

Everyone have a great weekend!

Okay, I am breathing a little easier at the moment.
I found both Spike's blog AND Britney's, and though they both go on and on about how much they love each other, there doesn't seem to be anything sexual going on... yet. But at least I'm not too late, eh?
Spike also fills out a quiz in his blog where he states he's never gotten high, but that he "would think about" having pre-marital sex. I'm certain he probably will, heh (I'm not that dumb), I'm just worried about the next couple years.
But so far, so good.

I can't access NotifyList.com from Scott's computer, but I did write a bit about some conversations over the last 2 weeks in the diary.

This is what our front yard looks like from our living room window. I can't show you the outside of the house because I ran the batteries down in my camera, but this is the gist of it.

It's even more spectacular from outside, but you'll have to use your imagination.

Toilet paper is fun!

Our house got toilet papered

Our house got toilet papered by the swim team last night. My kids are thrilled because that means they are loved, heh.
I'm just glad it's not a weekend that we were all gone, and also, since the kids are here with me, THEY get to clean it up.

Even funnier, Spike caught them doing it, and they ran away scared. He said it was hilarious.

That's Spike on the left, and his super-tall friend Alejandro on the right.

Buffy on left, best friend and swim nemesis Sara and the right.

Another early Saturday

6:10am and I've been up for 45 minutes already. Another swim meet, and then off to Aptos.

Spike graduated yesterday, it was a really nice graduation. Buffy graduated Thursday. I'll post pictures later. Well, maybe I'll post them now. Hold on just a sec...

Okay I put up more pictures, mostly from last year, but the first two are from this month. Just click that link on the right that says "Pictures".

Spike made up a new recipe.

Spread peanut butter on a tortilla.

Put a whole peeled banana on top.

Roll up like a jellyroll.

Eat it!

I woke up this morning and this cold has finally broke. Still have sniffles but I feel SO much better.

Buffy cut her stitches out of her thumb all by herself yesterday. It was really gross. But she just clipped and pulled, clipped and pulled. Nine times. The tenth one is a problem, there's not much there to cut. But we have to get it out today cuz her thumb is healing right up.

Yeah, we'll probably take another picture, heh.

And more pics on Three65Pics too.

Busy Busy Day

I took a very cool picture of the ghastly thumb - I'll try to post it up today. I brought my camera to work and showed everyone and even the men were like AAAAAAAAAGH!!! EW GROSS!!!! hahahhaa...

This afternoon I register Spike for high school, which in this case is a much more complicated process than normal. I have to bring with me:

his birth certificate
his last report card
my rental agreement
pge bill
dmv registration
voter address confirmation
IRS receipt
another bill with my name on it

All because everyone and their auntie wants to go to this brand new high school and people have been forging docs to get in, and now there's no room for the kids who belong there. Anyway it will be a long afternoon, and then Buffy has open house after.

I'll *try* to post that picture tonight, if not you may be out of luck for awhile, heh.

Just got back from the hospital where Buffy got 10 stitches in her thumb. She wanted to make homemade frenchfries so she was cutting up a potato with a serrated steak knife, ended up slicing her thumb from top to bottom all the way through and even cut a chunk out of the middle. The very nice doctor lady couldn't even figure out how she'd done it. Buffy barely shed a tear.

BUCKETS of blood, you should have seen it.

Yeah, the happy kids didn't last for long, yesterday morning Spike was furious taht Buffy wouldn't let him take her Starbucks travel mug I bought for her birthday to school with him. I wouldn't have let him either!!! Junior high school kids are very good at losing things.

But by afternoon they were friends again.

It's Wednesday morning, I have a lovely man to go kiss right now.

Spike is totally grounded as of today,
But right now I can hear him and Buffy playing happily in my room,
And I just love those sounds so much.
They love each other so much
And I love them too.

Here is the new birthday desk! But hers is in Maple, not Cherry.

"Some Assembly Required", that always cracks me up. It comes in a perfectly flat box, so I'm thinking it will "require" a bit more than "some". But Buffy is really happy and very excited.

My son "picked up" a girl from McDonald's today, with the help of his sister - Thanks, Buffy.
She comes from the very very rich neighborhood up the street. I'm thinking I should warn her from getting suckered into supporting his StarBucks habit.

Buffy said she's a "dumb blonde" who apparently didn't even know what street she lived on and had to ask her friend. Again, Thanks Buffy.

Happy Birthday Buffy! And Happy Birthday Itsy too!
Buffy is playing video games while I wait for the transmission shop to open up so I can call them. Scott checked the fluid in the Jeep, it's full, so the Jeep does need a new transmission. Hopefully the convertible's transmission just needs a little fixing. Yes, I have my tax check but I was counting on paying back my mom and some bills with it. But things happen I guess.
It has been pouring rain here. But I heard it may clear this afternoon. Then we will walk down to the little shopping center, have lunch, get a cake mix from Longs, maybe go to ColdStone Creamery. Hope it doesn't rain on the walk home, hah.

Okay, we will figure something out. Buffy has been chirpily drawing pictures for her birthday, and she's having a great day - at only 7:30am. We will figure something out.

So I got it, and my son was absolutely GA-GA over it, and Buffy and I were waiting for him to put it together so we could play...

And then "the hottest girl in school" called him, and he's been shut in his room with the phone ever since.

Buffy and I tried to hook it up, it no workee.

Buffy finally went to bed, Spike is still in his room with the phone, and I am going to be a grown-up and figure out why plugging in two plugs does not a video game make.

And the last one, Buffy at Starbucks.

Isn't she pretty in this one?

Spike doing his homework at

Spike doing his homework at Starbucks:

Oh wait, that's not his homework, that's his Harry Potter book!

The ever elusive Spike who

The ever elusive Spike who hates to have his picture taken:

I'm not sure why I

I'm not sure why I love this one, it's taken at Scott's school. And I think that for me it's just a combination of many things, including Buffy, that I love very much.

This is Buffy laying on

This is Buffy laying on her blanket at the park. I believe this was July 2003.

I don't know when I'll

I don't know when I'll be able to get Three65Pics back up and running, as I need a SuperGold membership to bring it back up and I cannot afford that right now. But I have this spiffy new place here, so until I get it up I am going to start posting some of my favorite pictures that I have been saving.

For instance:

Buffy at the Aptos Coffee Roasting Company, drinking her smoothie after a long day at the beach with Mom (June 2003)

I have one news flash for you:
Buffy cleaned her room!
ALL of it, completely, even her closet, and ALL BY HERSELF.
Those of you who haven't met Buffy may not realize the importance of this.

Okay, off to blow my nose.

I really want to write about my son and how me makes me crazy, also how work makes me crazy, but I'm still hungry and Spike is sitting right here so I think instead I'll go get something to eat and then write an entry later.
I know, I am sooooo entertaining.

I came home from work and Spike is in bed "taking a nap" and he has a fever.
:-(
But he woke up when I walked into his bedroom and said he was hungry and his forehead didn't feel too hot, just a little fever.
He doesn't have school tomorrow so he'll get a chance to rest before Thanksgiving.
I hope he feels better real soon.

Today I dropped off my two kids and one of Buffy's friends at the mall. I gave my kids $40 to do their Christmas Shopping, and $20 more to buy them all lunch.
I picked them up 90 minutes later (I was at the gym across the street) and asked them if they ate yet.
No. They didn't have enough money.
Their long, drawn out story was that they asked "the lady" how much the gift for me was, she told them, so they told her they'd get it, and gave it to her to personalize it, however when they went to ring up the sale, suddenly it was so much more.
Like, all their money more.
And there was no refunds, due to the personalization.
So I'm getting a Christmas Present from my kids that cost $60.
oh. yay.

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