Trying to keep busy while Erin is gone, it's certainly not easy though.

The patio has turned into a botanical garden. We have a blooming mandarin orange tree next to the lime tree now, MANY more flowers in pots all over, and a large jasmine vine in front of a window where the sun shines too brightly through in the summer. The only thing the bird bath seems to attract is thirsty cats, but soooo many birds have been playing around in the "weed" tree. I love it because I can sit on the patio and watch them play all day. There have been a lot of hummingbirds too, and the roses are just starting to bloom. Hopefully they'll all be open when Erin comes on Tuesday, because that first bloom is always so beautiful.

All I've been doing is working on the yard, or sitting at the patio table and reading, eating or sunning.

And yes, reading, I haven't read this much since finishing my English degree. Finished The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, re-read Fun Home in an afternoon, and am plowing through The Girl Who Played With Fire now. Somehow the reading really does keep my mind off of Erin and all the horrible scenarios that my imagination has been conjuring up. I don't know why it is that I'm able to concentrate on these stories, but I'm glad or else I'd be going crazy.

The house is not making progress though. Our stupid vacuum has been broken for quite a while now and with two women and two cats walking around OMG THE HOUSE NEEDS TO BE VACUUMED. But I haven't managed to get it in to the shop -- Spike used to do that for me!! So in a fit of desperation/laziness, I ordered a Dyson online, 2-day shipping so it would get here by Friday and I could happily vacuum the house all weekend (don't think it won't take an entire weekend). But no. Apparently when you order from Buy.com you should read the shipping FAQ first. Because 2-day shipping to them means: 2-3 days order processing, 2-3 days warehouse processing, THEN 2-day shipping... and we're only talking business days here. So I'm not going to get the vacuum until (hopefully!!) Monday, one week after paying $30+ for 2-day shipping. And there's not a damn thing I can do about it. Never again, Buy.com! I could have ordered from Amazon, paid around the same amount and gotten it by now.

I'm not sure how much vacuuming I can do Monday when I have a lot of (employment) work to do too. And knowing our mailman it won't come until 5pm anyway. So Erin will have to close her eyes and head straight for the back patio, where I've been spending all my time.

She comes home on Monday and I'll (HOPEFULLY) get to see her on Tuesday, but then she leaves again for Chicago the very next day. At least I'll be able to talk to her on the phone then. Unless all the dumb imaginary scenarios that have been running through my head have come true and she never wants to see me again -- See how awful my brain has been running? Well nothing anyone can say will make me stop worrying. I thought I would be okay while she was gone, but it turns out I haven't been.

So I'll just keep adding flowers and reading and hoping that Tuesday I'll have my beautiful girl back again.

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