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Buffy is now on her way to Arizona.
I'm sad. I miss her and I want her to be safe.

I just got my Writing Skills Test back from the University and I got a PERFECT SCORE. I scored high enough to waive one of my Upper Division GE courses - except that the English Major won't allow you to skip that class, so bummer. But it does allow me to now register for any upper division class I want to, so YAYYYY.
I am really excited about this, because it was a hard test, and I have heard most people don't pass it the first time, but I got a perfect score and Yes, I am Proud of myself!

Today the maids come again.
:-D

What I never mentioned is that our church pastors (husband and wife) retired today. I think they've been at our church for like 20 years, and they've been my pastors since Spike was baptized at 11 months old. They've seen us through a lot, two kids growing up, a divorce, money problems, the house burning down, getting the kids to church camp, two deaths in a year - even when we had to put our cat down - on and on and on and on... and now they won't be at church anymore.

And I was so upset about it, not only have I chosen to ignore that fact for the last six months but I couldn't even bring myself to go to their retirement today. I just couldn't. I couldn't say good bye to any more people in my life. I don't even know if they are going to still worship at our church, or if they're moving away or what, and I can't bear to ask. I even had nightmares about them leaving in the last couple weeks, heh.

So anyway. This weekend I've kind of been a wreck. It's just more people we're close to who are leaving. It makes life kind of hard.

More ranting.

To be fair, Murphy pointed out that the Brit picture below is photo shopped, with the original to be found here.

Which does point out the horrors of celebrity-dom, because that is pretty damn horrible to have a picture of you changed like that and then posted all over the internet.

But two more points:

First of all, Britney is still far from ready to go out of the house in the real picture. I never drive down the street and see anyone looking like that who is not either a) selling something in the vicinity of the vagina, or b) happy the last sale bought enough crack to last the day. Britney has millions and millions of dollars, why can she not find a nice comfortable dress to wear, something presentable, I mean those shorts don't even look comfortable. I don't think celebrities need to dress up to leave their house, but there are comfortable weekend wear to be found at any clothes shop, be it K-Mart or Target or fucking Bloomindales or Dolce & Gabbana or WHEREVER. GET DRESSED FOR FUCKS SAKE.

And second, except for these photoshopped pictures, I'm not buying the "Scary papparrazzi" story. You never see any other papparrazzi in the pictures, I didn't see any photographers with their cameras shoved into the car windows as she drove off with the kid on her lap. These pictures actually seem to be taken from a distance away, so I just don't buy this supposed "danger".

I had a baby once, in fact I had two babies 18 months apart. I still found presentable clothes to wear out of the house, and my hair usually looked like I had washed and combed it. And photographers or not (and there were NOT) I still found some nice comfy clean sweats to wear and a comfy t-shirt that made me look presentable - EVEN when I had baby-spit-up all over me I looked presentable. I have never ever ever ever, not even when I had the flu, not when it was 105 degrees outside, not when I was a size 6 and hot and cute, not EVER, have I left the house looking like a pregnant crack whore ready for the afternoon shift on second street.

And we were making $20,000 a year, so Britney, shut the fuck up and get dressed. And buy a fucking brush. I HATE stupid women.

And THAT is why Christina wins.

What is WRONG with this "woman"!!!

I think this picture is actually from the last pregnancy but I'm not sure and really, IT DOESN'T MATTER.
What matters is that it even HAPPENED.

And yes, those are her panties peeking out from her... unzipped... shorts... as she lights... her cigarette...

Lose my eyeballs if they weren't attached

So I may have mentioned that after wearing glasses for 30 years, I just LOST my glasses for the first time... sometime last month, I have no idea when or where. I think maybe on our vacation in Volcano, but I really have no idea. I usually wear contacts, but wear glasses when my eyes are tired, or I'm too lazy to put my contacts in, or when my allergies kick up in Aptos. So suddenly they have disappeared, and right at the time that I'm on my last pair of contact lenses too.

So of course I waited until one of those tore before I made an appointment. So I've been walking around and trying to read for school with only one worn out contact in my eye. Let me mention that I am more than legally blind without corrective lenses. My poor eyes have been STRAINING to see this week.

I went to my appointment today, just to get glasses, which would have to be ordered ($205 AFTER insurance, DAMN) and when I put my one contact back in after the exam...

It disappeared. I guess it never actually made it into my eye. I sat back in the chair and looked at the blur in front of me, and blinked my eyes a few times, and then thought... why can't I see? OMIGOD my contact isn't in my eye! The doctor and eye combed the room, but it vanished.

So she had to sell me a pair of spares with no real contact exam yet. Heh. So now I have another appointment (which I needed anyway) to get fitted for the contacts. Dammit. I still cannot believe I lost my glasses.

We all know as soon as the check is cashed my old glasses are going to turn up, right? Like, right on my bathroom sink, or right next to my bed. Where they always are.

But my new frames by Coach are very cute. The internet picture does not do them justice. They are Cute.

I feel silly posting stuff like that, but you just can't measure my hatred for Britney (and Jessica) so sometimes I can't hold it in. Also, I just love Christina's new song. So bear with me.

Because blogs are for trash talking

Okay so I'm just going to admit it AGAIN, that I really do kind of love Christina Aguilera, and I REALLY. REALLY. LOVE. her new song "Ain't no other man". And the video is probably going to be played on my iTunes AT LEAST as much as Golddigger has been.

Face it. In the war between Christina and Britney, there is a clear winner.

First of all, Christina can sing. She can outsing Britney any day of the millenium. Christina will outsing Britney when they are both 80 years old and no one even remembers who that Louisiana white trash with the six kids was.

And then, you know, the whole growing up transformation thing. I mean, Christina went through her DIRTY stage, which drove me up the wall, but I kind of cut her a lot of slack for it because I understand the whole getting away from the Disney image thing, and the wanting the world to understand you're a full grown (dirty) woman now, and also - God help me if the press had been following ME around at that age, because I probably wouldn't have fared much better.

The thing is, Christina cleaned herself up real good. Britney is... done. You know, the sweet little sex bomb image is gone, never to reappear, and she never could sing. But Christina has it all, and you know what?

Good for her. Keep on singing.

Alarming (to me) student biography

From my class. I think I probably shouldn't really post it here, so I'll just put it below:

"i am working on getting my degree in psychology
and my degree in administration of justice. i am hoping to be a
forensic psychologist. i am also working on opening a tattoo shop."

Copy and pasted. I mean, aside from the COMPLETE LACK OF CAPITAL LETTERS, in your online college post (WHATever!)... that's quite a lot of goals, eh? I'm still trying to wrap my head around why you would need a psych degree and admin of justice to open up a tattoo shop, or how you could possibly maneuver being a forensic psychologist AND a tattoo shop owner. But the kicker is the answer to her post from another student:

"... i am also working on opening a tattoo shop."

WTF with the opening of the tattoo shop plans while you're in college? And WTF with the small "i". People make me CRAZY.

No wonder my eyes don't work

We're only into June and already I've read more books than I did last year!!

Friday Fill-In!

From Megs:

I'm addicted to... Coffee and sugar, especially sugar in my coffee

My dream house... is clean and has no teenagers in it

Last night... I watched VH1 - Top 10 shortest Hollywood marriages, Top 40 worst DIRRTY songs, and then switched to FUSE to watch... Pants Off Dance Off... I am telling you, I was missing QUALITY TV for two years people.

There's nothing wrong with... WRITING ABOUT SEX IN YOUR JOURNAL

When I was a kid... I was well behaved, got good grades, obeyed my parents and hated sports. I was the opposite of my kids. In fact, my kids probably would have kicked my ass, haha.

This weekend I shall... Go to a swim meet, then to Aptos for rest and reading.

And now it's time to DANCE

"18 years, 18 years, She got one a yo kids she got you 18 years..."

*dance on desk, waves arms in the air*

Happy Friday!

Ice cream party at work!!!

Look, I made a new banner for the journal: Click Here

Exciting Day

Bad News:
I can't find my glasses and I am down to only one contact in my left eye.

Good News:
I have an eye appointment Friday.

Best News:
I only have to work 20 hours to keep my benefits. I can do a good school schedule around that. Only 14 units, but I made a new plan with 14 units this year, and then 16 and 17 units my last year - I can quit work then if I need to. Or work something else out. But working 20 hours is really really great. Like, the best news I've had in a very long time!!

The word is that Belle and Prince the Poodle are getting along fine so far, even eating out of the same dish, and Prince can't wait to play with Belle (who is not quite ready for that yet).
I am so happy and relieved that Belle is going to finally have a happy life!

I wish SJSU would allow me access to enrollment soon, classes are filling up and I really have no idea when they'll open it to me. It's going to suck if I can't get the classes I want, but even worse if I can't get the classes I need!

Tomorrow: Swim Meet. Then drive to SanLuis Obispo to transfer my mother's dog to her new home.

Sunday: Rest. No dad, so, that's it I guess.

Spike the Idiot Savant

So my son, in his Sophomore year of high school, has already passed his exit exams for high school.

He's passed maybe four classes in 2 years, but he scored 50% more points than needed for his exit exams.

And he was totally shocked. TOTALLY. Where did this kid get the idea that he is stupid?? I don't get it.

School starts Monday

And now it's on to Mr. Shakespeare and Ms. Austen.

No Happily Ever After

I finished The Nanny Diaries last night and this is what I have to say:

a) Not the ending I had hoped for
b) This book is very well written
c) Almost doesn't even qualify as fluffy summer girl reading because it does have a point to it
d) Nanny Diaries and Devil Wears Prada basically have the same story line, but Nanny Diaries is much much MUCH better and really outshines DWP.
e) I wish someone could have adopted Grayer at the end.

I'm giving this book a Thumbs Up and a Must Read, and I'm knocking even more points off DWP just because it pales so much in comparison.

No time to write this week, but I'll have time soon. I just got my syllabus for my summer class and this is what I will be reading over the next 6 weeks:

Much Ado About Nothing ~~ Shakespeare
Pride and Prejudice ~~ Jane Austen
The Yellow Wallpaper ~~ Charlotte Perkins-Gillman
The Story of an Hour ~~ Kate Chopin
Shakespeare's Sister ~~ Virginia Woolf
The Bluest Eye ~~ Toni Morrison
Trifles ~~ Susan Glaspell

I am almost finished with The Nanny Diaries (I will be in a couple hours) and I really really like it. I hope it ends well, like maybe Nanny marries H.H. and they get to adopt Grayer and liver happily ever after, but I can't think any possible other good way. I am biting my nails worrying, haha.

I am feeling calmer now that I have my syllabus in hand. I guess school is good for me. I've been lost without it, haha.

If I quit work next semester I can have my Masters in hand in 3-1/2 years. Unbelievable, eh?
But not decided.

My house is CLEAN, and it smells like cinnamon (??) and the floors are clean and mopped and vacuumed, and the bathrooms are scrubbed and the kitchen is scrubbed and my bedroom is beautiful and the very long hallway that had not been vacuumed since October is now fun to run up and down. Or to skip down it.

I am glad I stood firm and made them stay. I do feel that I was in the right, since I had a signed quote from someone who had walked into every single room. There are a few things not done real well, and I am 99% sure they are little digs from the maids who were pissed that they had to clean such a horrible place, but I accept that. I would have dropped a toothbrush into a toilet (oops!) myself. Overall though they did a fantastic job and they must have worked very hard.

In two weeks when they come back I expect to have the house even more re-arranged, and they won't be so pissed at all the dirt to be cleaned (because there won't be any dirt to clean) and the house should be spic and span by then. Right now though the house is the cleanest it's been since I started school.

The maid supervisor who came to my house last week to quote the price just called me to say that the maids that came to clean said the house wasn't ready to be cleaned, that there were too many boxes everywhere and no one would notice they had cleaned, and they wanted to CANCEL.

I told her NO, they can clean what they can clean, there is PLENTY available to clean (for instance, both bathrooms, the kitchen, the hallway and my bedroom are empty), and she said okay and then made a big deal about how she was doing us a favor and would have to reschedule other people's home cleanings.

A. This lady came to my house herself last week and looked in every single room and then sat her very very large ass in my kitchen chair and wrote out a quote for me. Not only did she see the entire house, but we even moved MORE boxes since she came last week.

B. The only rooms that have piles of books and boxes in them are the family room and living room, and even those rooms have plenty of room to clean the majority. There is nothing wrong with: the entry-way, kitchen, dining room, my bedroom, hallway, hall bathroom and master bathroom.

If they have to reschedule other homes, that is their problem. The supervisor saw my house last week and gave me a quote and scheduled them for today. The house is 50% emptier than when she saw it. Those maids better clean what they can get to for the price that I was quoted and signed for.

To be clear: The supervisor obviously didn't clean houses, as she was just too large to clean houses for a living. And I personally thought the quote was very low, and felt bad for the maids that would be sent over. But underquoting is not my problem if she came to my house herself, looked at everything, and told me what it would cost. Now it's HER problem, and no, I don't feel bad.

Spent the weekend first at the swim meet (we won) and then in Aptos just napping and reading and napping and recovering from my cold. I have a slight cough but no big deal, mostly I just feel WAY better.

I finished reading The Devil Wears Prada and I have to say... not impressed. I'll see the movie cuz it looks cute, but the book was boring. And to my surprise, I got a lot of comments as I carried it around, and I didn't find anyone who had read it and actually liked it.

Now I'm reading The Nanny Diaries, only on page 11 and already it's better.

I have more to say, but it's late and you're gonna have to wait.

Still feel like crap and now I'm coughing up chunks of yellow gunk.
Thanks for asking.

:-P

gawd I feel like crap today.

Surprised?

My grades are in.

I got all A's.

Find a home for my mom's dog... Check!

A reader I've known for many years who lives in Southern California is going to take the dog. I am really confident she will have a very nice home. That makes me really happy.

Yes mother

Catie is like my big sister / mother, she looks out for me.
Here is a list of what Merry Maids will do for the price they quoted me. I did get a contract stating all this too. I am to call them immediately if a cleaning isn't up to "my standards", which is, hahahaha, so hilarious. Because I honestly don't have standards too terribly high. But then again, at $97 per, I better have a clean house.

They also charged $40 to clean an oven, which I thought was a bit high and declined. $120 to clean all the windows in my house. And $45 to clean my refrigerator. Those items are all things I can do myself, with not much trouble. It's the daily stuff I hate. Honestly, if they cleaned my bathrooms and all my floors I'd be thrilled.

I would take before and after pictures for you but I have high enough standards that you will never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever see the before pictures. So you'll just have to hear about it.

And now I go back to work.

Just do it

One clean house, coming right up!

So the maid supervisor came yesterday, which was kind of hilarious because she obviously didn't clean houses, and I really feel sorry for the real maids that are going to come and do the cleaning.

$287 for the first all-over cleaning (this is half the price I was willing to pay, the house is THAT BAD.)
$97 per time for every other week. If I go weekly it will be $88 per time, but I think every other week is fine.

Since we still have a few boxes and piles to get rid of they aren't going to come until next Tuesday. And then every other Tuesday after that. And Tuesday just happens to be the day Scott comes for dinner. :-D
"Why yes Scott, we DID clean the house nicely, didn't we?"

Just kidding, he knows we're getting a maid. Hee. I was telling him this morning that this seemed like a pretty good deal because I have the money. A year ago I never would have considered it. But for now, I have the money, and I don't have the time due to work and school. So the maid has a job for the next four years.

Next item: A personal chef.

Just kidding.

Okay, my official list of things to do now:

Meet some HOA inspector at my mom's house... Check!
Empty out what's left in her garage
Get my parents' taxes done - ASAP
Get a couch out of storage so I have a place to sit
Make an appointment with an eye doctor so I can get new glasses - I've somehow LOST my glasses ?!?!?!!!
Make an appointment with a dentist because I've chipped a tooth and pretty soon it's gonna go bad.
Find another home for my dad's dog
Go to DMV to change the name on my dad's car
Get that last bank account changed - ASAP
Go to my mom's school to get the last of her things

Even though that list is long, it's do-able and not causing me much stress. Plus, THE MAID is coming today. WOOOOOOO!!!!!

Clean House Clean House Clean House

I am so freaking happy that a MAID is coming to my house today I cannot stand it. I feel like I'm waiting to leave for Disneyland right now.

Today's Update

So today I:

Do not feel good.
Did not send out any of the lawyer paperwork I was supposed to.
Did meet the inspector.
Will meet the maid at 5:30pm.
Am really not feeling well.
Updated the journal.

and also, go to DMV to do paperwork for the sale of my mom's car. Ah well, so the list never really ends.

More checks:

Things I still have to do:

Meet some HOA inspector at my mom's house tomorrow morning
Empty out what's left in her garage
Get my parents' taxes done
Get a couch out of storage so I have a place to sit
Make an appointment with an eye doctor so I can get new glasses - I've somehow LOST my glasses ?!?!?!!!
Make an appointment with a dentist because I've chipped a tooth and pretty soon it's gonna go bad.

I think that's it. Omigod. I actually only have six checks left?? And one of them is done tomorrow? That's fantastic!!! Oh yeah, there's also a dog problem, forgot about that for a sec. Heh. Anyone want a free Bijon Friche? No really, she's free, great with kids, and you'll love her. OH, also I have to still switch a bank account of my mother's. And that's a pretty high priority. Funny how I forgot the two most important things, heh.

But that's it! So... eight checks total. That makes me happy.

Ew.

Nothing like an overnight guest projectile vomiting all over your house and a quick 4am drive to take the kid home.

The child is an awesome vomiter though. Man. All over the door even.

She was a trooper though. Didn't even cry. Buffy was the one having a fit about the mess all over her room.

It was quite a clean up. Poor kid.

I just took a look at my hit counter for the journal, and even though I know it's a really big number, I'm thinking the 11 billion hits it's showing now is probably wrong. That's hysterical. What happened to Honesty Counters??? 11 Billion hits? No chance.

University Student

Today I took my first test as a SJSU student. All Juniors must take the Writing Skills Test and pass before taking any upper division courses. You can only fail it twice and then you have to enroll in a Writing Skills class. So this morning I had to miss the kids' first swim meet so I could line up in the hot sun for an hour before the test started. Inside the class we had 45 minutes to write an essay, with everyone getting different topics. My topic had to do with a quote from D.H. Lawrence about how a snake must shed its skin or kill itself trying. I wrote five pages single space and my hand was completely cramped when I was done. Then 45 minutes for a 75 question multiple choice about editing. I finished 15 minutes ahead of time.

I won't get my scores for a couple weeks. I'm not real concerned, but you never know, and this would certainly be a blow to the timeline if I don't pass it. But... I'll pass.

I'm a Junior at the University!!!

I left the pool right before Buffy's first race, and I arrived back at the pool as it all ended. I think this is the first swim meet I've ever missed. We did win though.

To answer some questions that have been asked:
1. I've seen Under the Tuscan Sun and it's a much better movie than Stealing Beauty. But Stealing Beauty was beautiful. And the soundtrack is one of my top three.
2. Spike is definitely still into film. And getting a driver's license.
3. I think my "problem" probably isn't stress related because if it was, it would be constant, not just the first three days of my period. Also, most of my stress is finally gone. It definitely feels like some sort of chemical imbalance as it's happening which makes me pretty sure its hormones. Anyway, the yelling started last night, but as long as I stay calm and rested and the kids stay good we're all okay. One or two days to go.
4. I've taken Spanish before and it does make Italian a little easier, but it also makes it a little harder as it's "same but different". I've taken some Italian before too and love it, but Spanish is easier. Since I have to take a fluency test for some language before starting my Masters, I have to take all that into consideration. I still have time to think about it.
5. Leslie, I feel the same way about the Religion classes. I think it would be really interesting to find out more about all those different ones - SJSU even has classes on Mysticism, Native American religions, etc. And I think it would be a good background for the Literature major. So... really conflicted. As much as I would like the Religion minor, what other chance do you get to learn Italian? And I HAVE to be fluent in some language other than English. Spanish or Italian, Spanish or Italian...

Almost done with my current book, "The Undomestic Goddess". I definitely recommend all books by Sophie Kinsella for light, brainless, cute summer reading.

I love Rescue Me and want Denis Leary to be my sex slave.

Oops, I forgot I'm not supposed to talk about s-e-k-s here. Sorry.

Because I am Bold with a capital B and because that's how I managed to graduate with an English degree in two years, I emailed the Italian division of the Foreign Languages department at SJSU to ask about minoring in Italian.

And Professor Cereghino just emailed back with all the information I need to get into Independent Study for Italian classes the first year and will make an appointment with me to go over the Italian minor since "Dr. Cassarino will be in Italy over the summer" and it looks like I just may be able to do this! Learn Italian! Learn to read and study in Italian! This means I can minor in either Italian OR Comparative Lit. I'm so deliriously happy right now.

Still have the tingles though. Emotions up and down and down and up. Just have to deal with it.

Bah.

We can add to those symptoms an immediate extreme restleness, and some minor shakes. The tingling freaks me out. This is crazy, I HATE this mess.

uh oh... watch out...

See, I never did go to the doctor because sure enough after three days of my period *BLIP* I was all better. And now I'm due to start today, but I haven't yet, but I have all these vitamins ready to pop at the first sign of a problem. And just now I got some bad news over the phone - nothing to worry about, it's no big deal AT ALL - but I could feel this time how it set me off, and I'm not a raging mess but I could feel the depression hit me again. And then the heaviness in my stomache and up my neck and now the tingles are going all around my arms and legs and feet again. All within ten minutes. And now my head is getting all thick, and oh yuck I don't have time to be a raging lunatic this weekend - can you imagine my essay for the Writing Skills Test? "SHOVE THIS F-ING TEST UP YOUR F-ING ARSE, I HAVE THINGS TO DO AND KIDS TO YELL AT!!!!!"

Heh.

So I'm assuming my period will start any second now, and I am also now absolutely sure this problem isn't so much stress related as it is hormone related. It MUST have something to do with the time of the month - although it happened to be set off during some bad news, it's too much of a coincidence that it only happens from Day 1 of my period through Day 3 of my period and then completely shuts off as if someone threw a switch.

For now I'm going to TRY to take ya'll's advice... Vitamins, TRY to cut down the sugar (I need it for my coffee and we have friggin chocolate hazelnut cookies at home, HeLLOOO!), and my own medicine of just trying to sleep as much of it off as possible. Maybe I'll even get a Femme Boost at Jamba Juice on the way home - Hey, WHATEVER works I say. Better than terrorizing the kids all weekend. And Myself.

Okay, I'm off to get water for vitamins. Fun's over for a few days.

Where'd K-Fed go?

What the HELL??? Seriously, who the heck is this?? I am speechless.

Minor Difficulties

I have four weeks to decide on my minor, and it may come down to just what fits best with my schedule.
Here are my thoughts at the moment:

1. Religious Studies - Relatively easy, only 15 units required, fits perfectly into my schedule.

2. Italian - I want this one badly but there is a poor choice of class availability. 30 units required.

3. Comparative Lit - I would also love this one but the 18 units required would have to all be taken my senior year.

Religious Studies will be easiest but is my third choice.
I can only take 10 units of Italian the first year, so the other 20 units would have to be the second year - or beyond.
Comparative Lit presents a similar problem - I need that first year of language before I can start, and I can't really excell in that minor unless I take even more language classes. This kind of rules out that minor unless I want to take longer than 2 years to get my BA.

Aaargh, why does what I WANT to learn have to take so long?

Any comments or ideas?

Final grades aren't in until June 9, and you know what that means...

You all have nine days to hear me bitch and whine until they're posted.

Music recommendation for you

I don't know if you all like to try different types of music, or music from different countries, but the kids and I REALLY do. And I've discovered that I really like 90% of the CDs put out by Putumayo (I HATE the Celtic one. HATE.) We have so many of their CDs, but this weekend I got the Italian Cafe CD and I really really love it.

Who knows, maybe some of you hate the Putumayo CDs, but the kids and I really do love them, and I really really love this one. So I'm just passing that along.

Gross

I still don't understand how women manage to pee all over the toilet seat at work.

I mean, I've heard that some people "hover" to avoid germs.

But if you can't hover in one place then maybe you should just pull out one of those paper covers that are specifically made for protecting your pristine behind from the germs of the rest of us.

My pee goes directly into the toilet, that's all I have to say. And I would rather your pee wasn't all over my behind.

My Book List

I have 2-1/2 more weeks to complete six books that I want to read (before school starts again). I have finished two already and am on my third. Shall we take bets as to how many I will finish?

The Truth.

"There's good things, but everything is tainted with an undertone of sadness." ~ from a friend who just lost her mother recently.

And it's very very true.

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