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Musings on Life now
Scott is going to meet extended family tomorrow for the first time. I warned him that my sister and I look very much alike, especially whenever I have a weight gain (like now), and to be careful not to get too close to the wrong girl. "Does she have the same smile as you?" he asked. I thought about it. And I honestly couldn't remember seeing her smile. In fact, the thought of my sister with a smile on her face kind of makes me have the giggles. "Just be careful," I told him, "You do NOT want to put your arm around the wrong girl." And the more I think about it, the more I wonder if there isn't just something WRONG with that girl. I mean... we were raised in the same family, and yet she is just mean, angry, hateful, spiteful, pessimistic... ...gloomy... It's hard to come up with the correct word to describe her, she is just the complete opposite of me. You would NEVER, EVER hear someone describe her as "Cheerful". Or, "such a happy person". Or especially, "such a joy to be around." Again, the giggles are coming, just thinking about someone saying that about her. So, you all wanted to hear about my sister, there ya go. In other news, I asked my aunt if she would come to my graduation in the Spring, and she said yes, and I asked if she would be my substitute mom for awhile, because honestly the idea of not having a mom is kind of getting to me. I walked through the mall with Buffy today, looking for clothes for tomorrow, and I kept looking at little things thinking "I could get that for my mom for Christmas." And then I remember she won't be there for Christmas. And then I got super sad because I never ever had enough money to get her anything really nice, and I was really looking forward to this year and being able to get her some nice presents. For us, it was always the thought that counted, she often regifted us with things her little first graders had given her, and we knew they were regifts, and it never mattered (well, except to Sister - but I am not counting her as part of my family)(and also, she never even came for Christmas). But even though it was the thought that counts, I still wish that I could have ever done something nice for her after all she did for me. I mean, ... I couldn't even save her life. It would have been nice if I could have done something for her while she was alive. Posted by Pischina at October 28, 2005 8:59 PMComments
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